Allow me to paint a picture: At a small dinner party hosted by Louis, the president of an advertising agency, and his wife, Lillian. The evening kicked off with cocktails, followed by a gourmet meal paired with a selection of exceptional wines. The conversation flowed easily, the food was delectable, and the wine flowed generously.

As the evening drew to a close, Louis raised his glass for a toast, a few drops of wine escaping and staining the tablecloth. That’s when a young woman, Bob’s date and a new art director, let out a giggle and said, “I can tell you’re feeling no pain.”

The reaction was immediate and intense. Shockwaves rippled through the table, freezing everyone in their tracks. It was evident that our host was slightly inebriated, but the woman’s comment, even if made in jest, was like shattering the crystal chandelier above the table with a dinner plate.

Thankfully, one of the guests quickly came to the rescue, lifting her glass and offering a more fitting toast: “None of us is. No one in the company of Louis and Lillian could ever feel any pain. Here’s to a truly wonderful evening.” Louis gracefully resumed his toast to the wonderful company, and the awkwardness dissipated. However, Bob, the new art director, couldn’t help but feel that his date’s innocent teasing had left an indelible mark, not only on his personnel file but also on his personal file.

The Little Cathood of Teasing

Teasing is often considered a common conversational practice. You’ve probably encountered it at gatherings, where people pat each other’s paunches, comment on receding hairlines, or make quips at someone else’s expense. Little cats, as we’ll call them, find amusement in these jests, believing they’ve stumbled upon comedic gold. They might say things like, “Enjoying that cheesecake, huh?” or “Hair today, gone tomorrow, huh?” The pinnacle of their humor is often a barb delivered with a hearty “Hardy har har.”

Technique: Trash the Teasing

Now, here’s the crux of the matter: teasing, particularly when it involves making jokes at someone else’s expense, is a telltale sign of a little cathood in the world of conversation. While an innocent jest might earn you a cheap laugh, it’s the big cats who will have the last laugh. They construct a figurative glass ceiling to protect their territory, making it challenging for little cats to step on their paws.

So, the lesson here is clear: Never, under any circumstance, make a joke at someone else’s expense. The price you’ll pay for that fleeting moment of amusement is bound to be steep. Instead, elevate your conversational skills by focusing on positive and uplifting interactions that leave everyone feeling respected and valued.

In the realm of conversation, the big winners are those who know how to navigate discussions with grace and tact. They understand that humor need not come at the cost of someone else’s dignity. By adhering to this principle, you’ll not only avoid the world’s worst conversational habit but also establish yourself as a considerate and savvy communicator, a big cat in your own right.