In the chaos of modern life, the concept of control often feels elusive. We grapple with endless responsibilities, external pressures, and uncontrollable circumstances that seem to dictate our actions and emotions. However, Stoic philosopher Epictetus offers a profound insight that can simplify this complexity: our true control lies not in managing the external world but in mastering our minds.
According to Epictetus, the essence of control is limited to our own reasoned choices and actions. This fundamental truth can transform how we approach life’s challenges, focusing our energy on what we can influence. Understanding and embracing this circle of control can cultivate clarity, reduce stress, and navigate our lives with greater purpose and resilience.
“We control our reasoned choice and all acts that depend on that moral will. What’s not under our control are the body and any of its parts, our possessions, parents, siblings, children, or country —anything with which we might associate.”
—EPICTETUS, DISCOURSES, 1.22.10
The Epictetus Doctrine
Epictetus, a central figure in Stoic philosophy, offers a profound insight into the nature of control and personal responsibility. His doctrine, “We control our reasoned choice and all acts that depend on that moral will. What’s not under our control are the body and any of its parts, our possessions, parents, siblings, children, or country—anything we might associate with,” distills a complex philosophy into a practical framework for daily living.
Epictetus highlights a crucial distinction: the only true domain of control is our own reasoned choices and actions. This encompasses our thoughts, decisions, and responses, guided by our moral will and personal values. This perspective challenges us to focus inward rather than attempting to control external factors, which are inherently beyond our complete influence.
For instance, while you can choose how to respond to a challenging situation, you cannot control it. Similarly, you can decide how to care for your body but cannot guarantee its health indefinitely. This understanding encourages shifting from controlling external outcomes to focusing on internal responses and decisions. Epictetus’ doctrine thus serves as a guide for managing personal expectations and fostering inner resilience.
The Essence of Control
At the heart of Epictetus’ philosophy is the idea that the essence of control lies solely within our mental and emotional realm. This principle simplifies life’s often overwhelming complexity into a manageable focus: the mind.
When we speak of control in this context, we refer to our ability to shape our thoughts, attitudes, and choices. The physical body, although it can be maintained through healthy habits, is not entirely within our control. Unexpected illnesses or accidents remind us of this inherent limitation. Similarly, external conditions such as societal norms or family dynamics are beyond our direct influence.
This realization clarifies by narrowing our focus to what we can impact. Rather than expending energy on factors outside our control, we concentrate on how we respond to these factors. This shift enables us to direct our efforts more effectively and manage our expectations in a way that aligns with our actual sphere of influence.
Embracing the Circle of Control
Embracing the circle of control fundamentally changes how we navigate life’s challenges. This principle simplifies the array of responsibilities and concerns into a singular focus: managing our own choices and reactions.
The circle of control provides a framework for clarity and focus in a world brimming with uncertainties and external pressures—ranging from career demands to global events. We can concentrate on what truly matters by acknowledging that only our responses and decisions fall within our control. This focus helps reduce stress and anxiety associated with external factors beyond our influence.
For example, if you face a personal setback, understanding that your reaction to the setback is within your control allows you to approach the situation with greater composure. You can choose how to address the challenge, seek solutions, and adjust your mindset. This acceptance of limitations not only alleviates unnecessary stress but also empowers you to act with intention and purpose.
Furthermore, embracing this principle fosters resilience. You build mental strength and adaptability by focusing on what you can control. This proactive approach helps you navigate life’s uncertainties with a balanced perspective, maintaining a sense of agency and control over your responses and decisions.
The Power of Focused Choice
The power of focusing on what you can control—primarily your own choices and actions—offers significant benefits for personal development and well-being. This focus streamlines decision-making processes, enhances clarity, and cultivates a sense of purpose.
When you concentrate on your own choices, you reduce the cognitive load associated with managing external variables. This clarity allows you to make decisions that align with your values and goals without being swayed by factors beyond your control. For instance, in a stressful work environment, you can maintain a positive attitude, seek constructive solutions, and manage your responses effectively.
This focused approach also fosters a deeper sense of autonomy. By taking ownership of your choices and their outcomes, you empower yourself to shape your path. This empowerment contributes to greater satisfaction and fulfillment as you actively steer the course of your life based on your own decisions.
Moreover, focusing on what you can control enhances emotional resilience. By accepting the limits of your control and directing your efforts toward manageable aspects, you reduce frustration and anxiety. This emotional stability enables you to handle challenges calmly and composedly, leading to improved overall well-being.
In essence, the power of focused choice lies in its ability to simplify decision-making, enhance autonomy, and build emotional resilience. Concentrating on what is within your control fosters a more intentional and fulfilling life, navigating challenges with clarity and purpose.
Daily Stoic Meditation: What Can I Put Outside My Circle of Control?
There’s nothing you can control except for how to choose to react to any situation. Your response depends on your mind. You can only control your mind and your decisions. You can’t control what others think or do. You can only respond to what happens around you.
I have often written about how the human mind is like a car with poor navigation controls because emotions and logic don’t get along well.
I have seen that when I am running, I give up in my mind before my body gives up. I will even think my body gives up because my mind gives up. I say so because there are days when I stretch myself too thin in the gym or in dance classes, and I don’t die of exhaustion. I still have enough strength to drive back home.
Why do I give up when I know my body can take it? My mind gives up and I let it do so. Everything else but my mind is outside my circle of control.
My father always tells me this one thing he learned: Focusing on what other people have done to you is pointless because the only thing you can control is yourself. So focus on what you must do at any given time. Our problems begin when we focus on finding faults with other people and that’s the road to anger.
Conclusion
Embracing the concept of the circle of control is more than a philosophical exercise—it’s a practical tool for achieving mental clarity and emotional resilience. By recognizing that our true power lies in our ability to shape our thoughts, decisions, and responses, we liberate ourselves from the burden of trying to control the uncontrollable.
This focus on internal control simplifies our approach to life’s myriad challenges, enabling us to act with intention and purpose. As we concentrate on what we can genuinely influence, we cultivate a deeper sense of autonomy and satisfaction. Ultimately, understanding and applying the circle of control helps us navigate life’s complexities with a composed and empowered mindset.
This article is a part of The Daily Stoic Meditations Series based on Ryan Holiday’s book.