In a world saturated with distractions and endless choices, the quest for meaning and fulfillment can often feel overwhelming. We find ourselves pulled in multiple directions by societal expectations, peer comparisons, and the incessant allure of material wealth.
Amidst this chaos, Marcus Aurelius’s wisdom shines through, urging us to focus on what truly deserves our attention and effort. He reminds us that the greatest prize lies not in the accumulation of possessions or status but in the cultivation of self-awareness and genuine values.
By prioritizing our personal growth and the unique aspects of our journey, we can liberate ourselves from envy, jealousy, and the burdens of excess desire. This article explores the significance of understanding what we truly prize in life, highlighting the transformative power of intentionality and clarity in our pursuits.
“What’s left to be prized? This, I think—to limit our action or inaction to only what’s in keeping with the needs of our preparation . . . it’s what the exertions of education and teaching are all about—here is the thing to be prized! If you hold this firmly, you’ll stop trying to get yourself all the other things. . . . If you don’t, you won’t be free, self-sufficient, or liberated from passion, but necessarily full of envy, jealousy, and suspicion for any who have the power to take them, and you’ll plot against those who do have what you prize. . . . But by having self-respect for your mind and prizing it, you will please yourself and be in better harmony with your fellow human beings and more in tune with the gods—praising everything they have set in order and allotted you.”
—MARCUS AURELIUS, MEDITATIONS, 6.16.2b–4a
What’s Left to Be Prized?
In our fast-paced, consumer-driven society, the question of what we truly value has never been more pressing. We are bombarded with messages urging us to chase after the latest trends, material possessions, and societal accolades. However, Marcus Aurelius invites us to adopt a more contemplative approach that prioritizes our intrinsic needs and prepares us for meaningful engagement in the world. This contemplation becomes essential in an era where superficial desires often overshadow profound aspirations.
To “prize wisely” necessitates a meticulous evaluation of our motivations. What do we seek, and why? This introspective process requires us to confront uncomfortable truths about ourselves and our desires. Often, we may realize that many of our pursuits are influenced by societal expectations or peer pressure rather than genuine interests. In this context, it becomes crucial to engage in self-reflection, cultivating a deeper understanding of our core values and passions.
Engagement in education and teaching becomes a pivotal aspect of this self-discovery. It serves as a means of acquiring knowledge and a platform for exploring our interests and potential. Education empowers us to think critically about the world, equipping us with the tools necessary for discernment. As we delve into various subjects, we uncover insights about our preferences, talents, and inclinations, leading us to the realizations that shape our future endeavors.
When we align our actions with personal development, we foster a life rich in authenticity. Identifying what truly matters encourages us to pursue goals that resonate with our values. This alignment enhances our sense of fulfillment and fosters resilience against external pressures. By prizing our unique paths, we cultivate the ability to navigate life’s challenges with grace and confidence, firmly grounded in the understanding that societal benchmarks do not dictate our worth but rather by our commitment to self-growth.
Freedom from Envy and Jealousy
In a world where comparison often reigns supreme, failing to prize the right things can trap us in a debilitating cycle of envy and jealousy. These emotions can creep in uninvited, manifesting in our thoughts and actions. When we fixate on what others possess—wealth, achievements, or social recognition—we cultivate a mindset that diminishes our sense of self-worth. Instead of celebrating our unique journeys, we become fixated on perceived inadequacies.
This preoccupation with others’ successes can lead us down a dark path. We may resent those who seem to have what we desire, adopting a scarcity mentality that suggests not enough happiness, success, or fulfillment. This mindset breeds bitterness, leading to a disconnection from our values and a detrimental sense of competition rather than camaraderie.
We must cultivate self-respect and learn to prize our unique strengths and achievements to escape this cycle. Embracing our individuality empowers us to appreciate our talents and contributions without comparing them to others. This shift in perspective fosters emotional resilience, enabling us to navigate setbacks and disappointments without succumbing to jealousy. By recognizing that our worth is inherent and not contingent upon external validation, we can celebrate the achievements of others with genuine joy rather than bitterness.
Furthermore, fostering a culture of gratitude enhances our capacity to appreciate our lives. When we focus on what we have rather than what we lack, we cultivate an environment where positivity thrives. This practice not only elevates our mood but also strengthens our relationships. By applauding the successes of our peers and recognizing their hard work, we create a supportive community that uplifts rather than divides. Ultimately, by embracing self-respect and gratitude, we liberate ourselves from envy and jealousy, paving the way for deeper connections and greater overall happiness.
The Harmony of Self-Respect and Connection
Self-respect is the bedrock of our interactions with others. When we recognize and prize our own worth, we naturally gravitate toward relationships and endeavors that resonate with our authentic selves. This alignment fosters a sense of harmony in our lives as we engage with others from a place of authenticity and vulnerability.
The cultivation of genuine connections becomes vital in this context. We create a supportive environment that nurtures our growth by surrounding ourselves with individuals who share our values and aspirations. These relationships become a source of inspiration, encouraging us to pursue our passions and develop our talents. When we interact with others who celebrate our uniqueness and support our endeavors, we foster a community that empowers each individual to thrive.
Moreover, this practice of self-respect aligns us with a greater purpose. As we acknowledge our worth and contributions to the world, we tap into a sense of belonging that transcends individual pursuits. Recognizing the interconnectedness of our lives enhances our capacity for gratitude and appreciation. When we see ourselves as part of a larger tapestry, we find solace in knowing that our experiences, challenges, and triumphs are integral to the human narrative.
This harmony extends beyond our relationships and nurtures our connection to the broader universe. When we engage with life from a place of self-respect, we cultivate a sense of wonder and curiosity about the world around us. We become more attuned to the beauty of our surroundings and the intricacies of existence. This heightened awareness enriches our experiences, allowing us to find joy in the simple moments that often go unnoticed.
Ultimately, embracing self-respect fosters an environment of mutual support, understanding, and growth. It empowers us to engage authentically with others, creating a collective atmosphere of positivity and encouragement. In this space, we find a deeper connection with ourselves, our peers, and the universe, leading to a more fulfilling and harmonious existence.
A Case Study in Prioritization
The lives of individuals like Warren Buffett, John Urschel, and Kawhi Leonard provide powerful insights into the practice of prioritization. These figures exemplify the art of aligning one’s lifestyle choices with personal values, illustrating that true wealth lies not in material accumulation but in the freedom to pursue what genuinely matters.
Warren Buffett’s financial wisdom and humility poignantly remind us that success does not require extravagance. Buffett demonstrates a profound understanding of his priorities by choosing to live in the same modest home for decades. His focus on knowledge, relationships, and personal growth over material possessions underscores the notion that happiness is not contingent upon wealth but on clarity of purpose. By eschewing ostentation, Buffett creates space for pursuits that enrich his mind and spirit.
Similarly, John Urschel’s decision to live on a modest income despite earning millions in the NFL highlights the importance of intentionality in prioritizing what truly matters. Urschel values education and intellectual growth, opting to invest in his future rather than indulge in a lavish lifestyle. His commitment to personal development is a testament to the idea that fulfillment is found in pursuing passions that resonate with our core values. Urschel demonstrates that true success is not measured solely by financial gain by prioritizing what aligns with his authentic self.
Despite securing a lucrative NBA contract, Kawhi Leonard’s choice to drive a 1997 Chevy Tahoe further exemplifies the principle of prioritizing what truly matters. Leonard’s lifestyle reflects a dedication to authenticity and a focus on the aspects of life that bring him genuine joy. This decision speaks volumes about his character, illustrating that he is not swayed by societal expectations or the pressure to conform. Instead, Leonard’s choices reveal a profound understanding of his values, allowing him to cultivate a life of satisfaction and contentment.
The common thread connecting these individuals is their unwavering commitment to clarity about what they prize most in life. Recognizing their unique passions and values allows them to navigate life’s challenges without being derailed by external pressures. Their stories are powerful reminders that true wealth is not merely about financial resources but also the freedom to engage in pursuits that nourish the soul.
The Burden of Excess Desire
In a society that often glorifies abundance, the relentless pursuit of numerous desires can become a burden, complicating our lives and detracting from genuine enjoyment. The more we chase after material possessions, accolades, or social status, the more we find ourselves dissatisfied. This burden manifests as stress, anxiety, and a pervasive sense of inadequacy that can overshadow our moments of joy.
When our lives become defined by what we lack rather than what we possess, we stifle our ability to appreciate the present moment. The constant striving for more wealth, recognition, and validation can lead to a mindset where we become mere spectators of our own lives, perpetually chasing the next achievement without savoring the journey itself. This mindset fosters a cycle of discontent, where happiness becomes contingent upon external markers of success rather than rooted in our internal sense of fulfillment.
We must actively narrow our focus to what we genuinely prize to break free from this cycle. This intentional shift allows us to reclaim our time and energy and engage deeply with our passions and interests. Instead of seeking validation through external accomplishments, we learn to derive satisfaction from growth and self-discovery.
By embracing a lifestyle characterized by intentionality and simplicity, we can cultivate a sense of contentment that transcends the superficial markers of success. When we prioritize what aligns with our values, we uncover a profound joy that can be found in the smallest of moments. This newfound perspective allows us to savor life’s simple pleasures, fostering a sense of gratitude that enhances our overall well-being.
Ultimately, the journey to discerning what deserves our attention is a deeply personal one. It requires courage, self-awareness, and a willingness to challenge societal norms. In this quest, we may find that the only prize worth seeking is aligning our actions with our deepest values and aspirations. By consciously choosing to prize what matters most, we pave the way for a life filled with authenticity, fulfillment, and genuine joy.
Daily Stoic Meditation: What Do I Truly Prize?
How would you define “enough” for you? Is there a point beyond which your needs are met, and you begin chasing material wealth that doesn’t bring you true happiness? It is the nature of desire to be unending if you understand that even a little is enough; if you don’t, you will never be content with what you have.
My most valuable possession is my book collection. I live in a comfortable house and drive a car around the city. My family buys the things we need based on their utility. I don’t understand the idea of overstretching oneself to buy things you don’t need and can’t afford. I don’t understand why people buy things because other people have them or they want to flaunt them in front of others.
I like to think that even if I become rich one day, I would value a life of quiet luxury and practice stealth wealth. I don’t have people in my life that I need to impress with my possessions because I have never once been impressed by others’ opulence. I prefer not to associate with such people if I can help it.
I value character and integrity in people. I like people who think critically and want to improve themselves. These are the qualities I hope to possess. There is nothing wrong with having money or having expensive tastes, but money should not be the focus and should not be seen as an achievement. Money is good for keeping score and does help avoid misery in life, but that’s where its purpose ends for me.
I value my connections with the people around me and want my presence to have a positive impact. Some people value their wealth with money; I do it with the relationships I build with people.
Conclusion
Ultimately, the only prize worth seeking is aligning our actions with our deepest values and aspirations. By honing in on what truly matters, we liberate ourselves from the toxic clutches of envy and the burdens of excessive desire, allowing us to cultivate a life rich in authenticity and fulfillment. The examples of Warren Buffett, John Urschel, and Kawhi Leonard are powerful reminders that true wealth is measured not by material possessions but by the clarity of purpose and the depth of our relationships. As we embrace this philosophy, we open ourselves to a more meaningful existence where joy derives from life’s simple yet profound aspects. By learning to prize wisely, we embark on a journey toward greater self-discovery, genuine connection, and lasting happiness.
This article is a part of The Daily Stoic Meditations Series based on Ryan Holiday’s book.