Ancient Egypt may seem like an unlikely place to draw lessons on communication, but there’s a nugget of wisdom buried in its history. Back in those times, the pharaoh treated a humble message runner like royalty if they brought good news to the palace. However, if the same runner had the unfortunate task of delivering bad news, well, it was his head that paid the price.

Though we’ve come a long way from pharaohs and severed heads, the spirit of that ancient practice lingers in today’s conversations. How we deliver news, especially the bad kind, can significantly impact how we are perceived by others.

The Wrath of Unsympathetic Delivery

Consider a scenario from modern life. You’re all set for a picnic, excitedly walking out the door with a picnic basket filled with peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. A neighbor on their porch, with a cheerful smile, casually glances at the sky and remarks, “Oh boy, bad day for a picnic. The newscast says it’s going to rain.” Suddenly, that smile becomes more infuriating than the impending rain. It’s not the bad news that rankles; it’s the unsympathetic attitude with which it’s delivered.

Or perhaps you’ve experienced something similar while rushing to catch a bus. You arrive at the Greyhound counter, gasping for breath, and hand over your cash to the sales agent. Their response? A grinning declaration: “Oh, that bus left five minutes ago.” It’s moments like these that can make you sympathize with the pharaoh’s quick solution.

The Power of Sympathetic Delivery

The crux of the matter is this: bad news is a part of life, and everyone finds themselves in the position of delivering it from time to time. However, the true art lies in how you convey that news. Professionals who have mastered this skill do it with the right attitude.

A doctor advising a patient that they need surgery does it with compassion. A boss informing an employee that they didn’t get the job takes on a sympathetic demeanor. Grief counselors at airports after fatal crashes share the grief-stricken sentiment of the relatives they’re assisting. In essence, they step into the shoes of the receiver.

Big winners understand this principle when delivering bad news. They do so with an acute awareness of the emotions their news is likely to evoke in the other person. It’s about sharing the sentiment of the receiver rather than projecting one’s feelings about the news.

It’s the Receiver’s Ball

In the world of communication, it’s essential to remember that delivering news, whether good or bad, is like a game of catch. A football player wouldn’t last two beats on the time clock if they made blind passes. A professional quarterback throws the ball with the receiver always in mind.

Before you toss out any news, keep your receiver in mind. Then, deliver it with a smile, a sigh, or even a sympathetic sob, not based on how you feel about the news, but on how the receiver is likely to take it.

So, whether you’re the bearer of unfortunate tidings or the harbinger of good news, approach it with empathy and understanding. In doing so, you’ll find that people not only appreciate your candor but also respect your ability to convey even the most challenging information with grace. And that, my friend, is a hallmark of a true communicator.