In a world where starting conversations can feel daunting—whether at a social event, a networking mixer, or even a casual gathering—finding a way to break the ice is often the key to making meaningful connections. Enter the Whatzit: a simple yet ingenious technique that guarantees you’ll never struggle to spark a conversation again.

The Whatzit is the ultimate conversation starter, whether you’re hoping to form new business partnerships, meet potential romantic interests, or engage with interesting people. All it takes is a unique, eye-catching accessory or object that sparks curiosity in others. So, what exactly is a Whatzit? And how can you use it to effortlessly connect with anyone in the room?

Let’s dive in.

What is a Whatzit?

A Whatzit is an object that serves as an immediate conversation starter. It is anything that you wear or carry that is unusual or eye-catching. The item can be as simple as a quirky piece of jewelry, a colorful scarf, a peculiar pair of shoes, or even an unusual pin on your jacket. It doesn’t blend into the background but stands out enough to intrigue others. Its primary function is to add flair to your outfit and provoke curiosity in others, prompting them to approach and ask, “What’s that?”

The genius of a Whatzit lies in its simplicity. It doesn’t require any special skills to create or use. You don’t need to be a fashion expert or have a deep knowledge of accessories. The key is to wear something visually distinct in a way that is subtle enough to feel natural but striking enough to get attention. It could be a pair of glasses, a brooch, or even an unusual bag that makes people stop and wonder about it. The object doesn’t have to scream for attention; it should be unique enough to spark curiosity.

Whatzit is not just about being quirky for the sake of it—it’s a deliberate social tool. The object becomes a signal to others that you are open to interaction. Instead of waiting for someone to approach you, the Whatzit draws people in by offering them an easy way to start a conversation. In a world where small talk often feels forced and awkward, a Whatzit provides a natural entry point, making interactions smoother and more genuine.

The Power of a Simple Prop

Whenever you go to a gathering, wear or carry something unusual to give people who find you the delightful stranger across the crowded room an excuse to approach. “Excuse me, I couldn’t help but notice your . . . what IS that?”

Technique #12 – Always Wear a Whatzit

The Whatzit is a masterclass in simplicity. It takes something mundane, like a piece of jewelry or a scarf, and turns it into an effective social tool that can completely change the dynamics of a conversation. The beauty of this technique is that it doesn’t require you to become someone you’re not or adopt a personality that doesn’t align with who you are. All it asks is that you wear or caṣrry something a little unusual.

The Whatzit is a beacon in any social setting—a networking event, a party, or a casual hangout. It’s a small, seemingly insignificant object, but it carries the power to draw attention and make you memorable. This makes it so effective: it does the hard work of getting people to approach you, making social interaction easier. People are naturally curious. They are often compelled to ask questions if they spot something interesting about you. This curiosity is the spark that ignites conversations.

For example, imagine you’re at a corporate networking event where everyone is wearing formal attire and following the usual routine of exchanging business cards and pleasantries. Then, someone walks in with a brightly colored tie or a brooch with an odd design. That person becomes the focal point of attention. Instead of introducing yourself with a rehearsed elevator pitch, people will likely approach you, intrigued by your choice of accessory, allowing you to engage in a more organic conversation. The Whatzit shifts the conversation away from traditional small talk, offering an entry point to share stories and experiences that wouldn’t come up in a typical exchange.

Moreover, the power of Whatzit lies not in making you stand out but in helping to create meaningful conversations. Instead of just talking about the weather or asking the same generic questions, Whatzit opens the door to deeper discussions. For example, if someone asks you about the antique pin you’re wearing, it might lead to a conversation about history, your interest in antiques, or your travels. Whatzit helps establish a personal connection, making interactions more memorable and authentic.

A Personal Example: The Lorgnette

To understand the impact of a Whatzit, one can look at a personal example. The author of this idea wears an old-fashioned pair of glasses that resembles a double monocle, an item with an interesting backstory. This piece of eyewear is not just functional—it’s unusual enough to make people ask about it, drawing curious individuals to initiate a conversation. Once someone asks, “What’s that?” it opens the door to an organic dialogue.

The glasses aren’t just a quirky fashion choice. They are a conversation starter that allows the wearer to share something personal. For example, the author may explain that the glasses are an heirloom, a gift from a grandmother. From there, the conversation could branch out into various topics, such as the history of the glasses, a discussion about aging, or perhaps fond memories of the grandmother who owned them. In this way, the Whatzit moves the conversation away from formal pleasantries and into a more intimate, personal realm.

The beauty of this technique is that it doesn’t feel like an effort. The Whatzit serves as the catalyst, but once the conversation starts, it flows naturally because it’s based on something real and personal. Moreover, the object often reflects something about the wearer’s personality or values, making the conversation even more engaging. For example, the glasses might be old and worn, suggesting a certain level of sentimentality or appreciation for family history, or perhaps they evoke a love for antique objects. These details enrich the conversation, creating a more meaningful exchange than what would have occurred without the Whatzit.

Whatzit techniques work on both ends. Even if you’ve never consciously used a Whatzit before, you may have fallen victim to its charm at one point or another. If you’ve ever been drawn to someone because of something they were wearing—something that piqued your curiosity and made you want to ask about it—you’ve experienced the Whatzit effect. It’s a subtle but powerful tool that works naturally without feeling forced or overly contrived.

The Whatzit Way to Romance

The Whatzit technique is not just a way to enhance your social life or business networking—it can also be an invaluable tool in the realm of romance. Let’s face it: starting a conversation with someone you’re attracted to can often feel intimidating. The pressure to be witty or charming is palpable, and it’s easy to overthink how to initiate the interaction. Here’s where the Whatzit shines—by removing the pressure to create the perfect line or clever opening.

Imagine attending a social gathering, and you spot someone you find intriguing across the room. They notice you, too, but are unsure how to begin a conversation. You both want to connect, but neither knows how to break the ice. Enter the Whatzit. If you’re wearing something unusual—an eye-catching necklace or a funny hat—it is an immediate reason for the other person to approach you. They might ask, “What’s that?” and from there, you have an opening.

The Whatzit doesn’t just help in initiating the conversation; it also adds an element of intrigue. It invites curiosity and invites the other person to learn more about you, and when the interaction feels natural, the potential for forming a deeper connection increases. Instead of a cold introduction, it feels more like a mutual discovery. The Whatzit, therefore, serves as both a shield and a bridge—shielding you from the awkwardness of trying to find the right words and bridging the gap to more meaningful interaction.

In this sense, Whatzit can be an incredibly effective tool for creating chemistry. Once the conversation has begun, you can dive into topics far less accessible with standard small talk. You might discuss your shared interests, hobbies, or even personal philosophies. This creates a sense of camaraderie, which is the foundation for any relationship, romantic or otherwise.

Be a Whatzit Seeker, Too

While the Whatzit is incredibly effective when you wear one, it’s equally important to become proficient at identifying them in others. When you’re seeking someone to speak with, whether at a business event, party, or even in a professional meeting, spotting the Whatzit of another person can make all the difference in starting a conversation. People are often more willing to engage in a conversation when it’s not just about small talk but about something that sparks genuine interest.

For example, if you’re at a networking event and see a potential business partner wearing an unusual tie clip or an interesting watch, don’t hesitate to comment. Ask them about the piece, its origin, or its significance. Maybe they’ll share a story about how they acquired it or how it represents something important to them. This is a great way to form a deeper connection, as it immediately allows the conversation to become more personal. By showing that you notice the details, you express interest in more than just the surface level.

Similarly, don’t hesitate to comment if you spot an unusual item on someone at a social gathering. Maybe it’s an interesting ring, a quirky pin, or a unique handbag. Asking someone about it doesn’t just make them feel seen—it shows that you’re observant and genuinely interested in getting to know them beyond their usual persona. This approach helps take the pressure off the other person, giving them an easy reason to engage with you. Doing so sets the stage for a more natural and authentic conversation.

The Whatzit as a Networking Asset

When it comes to networking, the Whatzit can be a game-changer. Business events often feel formal and routine, and interactions can feel transactional. People often stick to scripted questions and answers, like, “So, what do you do?” or “How’s business going?” The Whatzit shifts this dynamic by offering something more engaging—a reason to step outside the standard script.

Imagine you’re attending a conference and want to make an impression. The room is filled with professionals all dressed similarly, exchanging business cards and attempting to make valuable connections. But as someone approaches you and notices your Whatzit, whether a unique cufflink, an interesting tie, or a colorful pin, they have an immediate reason to speak to you. It breaks through the usual social barriers by offering a way that doesn’t feel transactional.

As a professional networking tool, Whatzit does the hard work of breaking the ice for you. Instead of trying to figure out how to introduce yourself, your Whatzit naturally invites people to engage with you. It is a personal touch in a sea of formalities, making you stand out authentically. And because people approach you out of genuine curiosity, the conversation that follows often feels more personal and less forced.

The Whatzit humanizes the process in business, where making connections can sometimes feel like a numbers game. It provides a real entry point into a discussion beyond business cards and resumes. And as the conversation deepens, the potential for real professional relationships and collaborations grows. Your Whatzit may become the gateway to more than just a superficial encounter—it could spark meaningful, long-lasting connections.

Conclusion

The Whatzit is a subtle yet powerful tool that transforms ordinary social interactions into opportunities for meaningful connections. A unique accessory or object can serve as the perfect conversation starter, whether at a professional event, a social gathering, or even trying to catch someone’s eye across the room.

Wearing something that piques your curiosity makes you more approachable and invites others to share in a natural and engaging dialogue. The best part? You don’t need special skills or rehearsed lines—just the confidence to wear something that stands out and lets others take the lead.

So, next time you head to a gathering, remember that your Whatzit might be the key to unlocking a world of new connections.

This article is part of the How to Talk to Anyone Series based on Leil Lowndes’ book.