In the grand symphony of human interactions, one principle reigns supreme: WIIFM, the acronym for “What’s In It For Me.” Savvy individuals understand that everyone constantly tunes in to this universal radio station. It’s the instinctive response that triggers the question, “What’s in it for me?” whenever someone communicates. This fundamental human tendency isn’t lost on sales professionals, who have elevated WIIFM to a guiding principle of their trade. Instead of opening their pitches with a laundry list of product or service features, they recognize that the real key to capturing attention lies in highlighting the benefits to the buyer.
Yet, for top-notch communicators, the game goes even further. Not only do they lay bare the “What’s In It For Me?” (WIIFM) factor, but they also spotlight the “What’s In It For You?” (WIIFY) aspect of the equation. This transparency is so pivotal that those who conceal WIIFM or WIIFY often find themselves relegated to the status of little losers.
The Transparency Game
Allow Leil to illustrate the importance of transparency through a personal anecdote. Leil once invited a casual acquaintance, Sam, to lunch with the intention of seeking his guidance on her speaking business. Knowing that there wasn’t much in it for Sam except the pleasure of her company and a delightful meal, she playfully acknowledged this fact. In essence, she revealed the WIIFY—the benefit to him—in a lighthearted manner.
To make the meeting as convenient as possible for Sam, she even gave him the reins. She let him choose the date and the best restaurant in his neighborhood. It seemed like a straightforward arrangement with clear WIIFM and WIIFY factors in play.
The Unseen Agenda
However, the day of their lunch consultation took an unexpected turn. As Leil entered the restaurant Sam had selected, she was met with an unusual sight. Sam was seated at the largest table in the room, surrounded by an assortment of individuals. It was clear that this was no place for a private consultation. To her dismay, she had unwittingly walked into a trap.
It wasn’t until coffee arrived after the meal that the true reason for Sam’s orchestrated gathering became evident. He wanted each person at the table to contribute presentations on their areas of expertise to his marketing association. Sam had concealed his own WIIFM—the benefit he sought—until it was too late.
Straight Shooting and Big Playing
In retrospect, Leil realized that had Sam been a straight shooter and a big player in the transparency game, he could have handled the situation differently. Instead of luring her into a group setting under false pretenses, he could have been upfront about his intentions from the beginning. A simple, honest conversation on the phone could have gone a long way. He might have said, “Leil, I’m gathering a group of speakers who could be valuable to my organization for a Dutch-treat lunch. While I’ll do my best to address your questions about your speaking business, please be aware that it will be a group of ten. Would you like to join us, or shall we schedule a separate meeting for more privacy?”
Leil would have been more than willing to share her insights with Sam’s group had he been transparent. Instead, both of them ended up on the losing side of the equation. Leil lost valuable time, and due to his trickery, Sam missed out on her free speech for his organization.
The Joy of Helping
The lesson here is clear: big winners in the game of human interaction reveal both WIIFM and WIIFY upfront. When you’re open about what’s in it for you and what’s in it for the other person, you come across as a straight shooter. More often than not, the joy of helping you out becomes reward enough for those you engage with. Don’t deprive them of that pleasure.
Unveiling the Importance
Transparency is a virtue that extends beyond business and professional interactions. It is equally crucial in personal relationships and when seeking or granting favors. Often, people shy away from expressing how important a favor is to them. They ask for assistance casually, almost as though it’s an afterthought. This reluctance to reveal the significance of the favor can lead to miscommunications and missed opportunities.
Allow Leil to share an example. Leil’s friend Stefan once approached her with a seemingly simple request. He inquired if she knew of any bands that his organization could hire for their annual event. Initially, Leil responded with a straightforward “No, I’m sorry, I don’t.” However, Stefan didn’t let the matter rest there. He persisted with questions, asking if she had worked with bands in the past during her time on ships.
As the questioning continued, Leil grew increasingly confused and irritated. Finally, she asked Stefan who was responsible for securing the band. To her surprise, he admitted that he was the one in charge.
Leil couldn’t help but feel frustrated by the indirect approach. If Stefan had been forthright about the importance of finding a band, she would have gladly undertaken the task of researching options for him. Instead, due to his roundabout method, they both experienced unnecessary confusion and annoyance.
Let Them Know
When seeking a favor or assistance, it’s crucial to convey just how significant it is to you. By doing so, you present yourself as a straightforward individual who values transparency. More importantly, you allow others the pleasure of helping you. It’s a simple yet potent act that strengthens relationships and fosters goodwill.
Asking or granting favors is an intricate thread that weaves the fabric of relationships. To ensure this fabric remains unfrayed, it’s essential to navigate it with sensitivity and candor. In our ongoing exploration of these delicate threads that bind us, we will uncover more ways to strengthen the bonds that enrich our lives.
The Art of Transparency
In conclusion, transparency is not a mere buzzword; it’s a powerful tool in our communication arsenal. By revealing both WIIFM and WIIFY upfront, we not only demonstrate our respect for others but also make it easier for them to reciprocate our actions. In the grand tapestry of human interactions, transparency is the thread that binds us, allowing us to navigate the intricate patterns of relationships with clarity and authenticity.
So, remember the lesson of “Bare the Buried WIIFM (and WIIFY).” Whenever you suggest a meeting or request a favor, lay your cards on the table, even if the benefits on either side are minimal. In doing so, you establish yourself as a person of integrity and openness, and you avoid being labeled a sly fox with a hidden agenda. Transparency is the key to smoother interactions, stronger relationships, and a more fulfilling life.