In the realm of communication, there’s a fundamental understanding that emotions often trump facts. It’s a lesson Leil learned firsthand when working with Helen Gurley Brown, the iconic figure behind Cosmopolitan magazine. Helen had a unique way of emphasizing the importance of emotion in communication, coining the term “Emo,” which effectively meant “Give more emotion!”

During Leil’s time working on an article for Cosmopolitan, she delved into the intricacies of communicating sensitive matters, particularly addressing young women’s desire to make their boyfriends more passionate. In her draft, she incorporated insights from psychologists, communications experts, and sexologists, believing that facts and expert opinions would be the key. However, her manuscript came back from Cosmo covered in red ink, with one resounding message: “MORE EMO” scribbled on every page.

Perplexed, Leil reached out to her editor for clarification. The editor explained that Helen Gurley Brown had a unique approach to communication—when the time was right, she believed in rejecting the rational and emphasizing the emotional. Helen recognized the power of emotion in human interactions, and her “MORE EMO” directive was a call to downplay the factual and empathize with the emotions at play.

Embracing Emo at L.L. Bean

The “smear on the emo” technique isn’t limited to the world of publishing; it extends to various facets of life, including customer service. A prime example comes from Leil’s experience with L.L. Bean, a renowned clothing and sports equipment retailer.

One day, Leil’s friend Phil decided to purchase a pair of navy-blue dress trousers from L.L. Bean after she showed him the quality of their products. Phil chose to wear these brand-new pants for a significant date at an elegant restaurant. However, as fate would have it, disaster struck when his date’s evening bag slipped from her hands. Phil, ever the gentleman, bent over to pick it up, only to hear a disheartening “Riiiiiiip!” The pants had torn right down the middle seam.

Most of the restaurant patrons tactfully averted their gaze, while a few couldn’t help but giggle. Phil, doing his best to discreetly hold the torn seams together, retreated to their booth. The remainder of the evening was marked by the uncomfortable sensation of the cool upholstery on his exposed derriere.

Naturally, Leil was livid and immediately contacted L.L. Bean’s customer service. The representative listened patiently as she recounted Phil’s embarrassing ordeal. However, her initial anger was still simmering beneath the surface.

Then came the genius move—Echo the Emo. The customer service agent, recognizing the emotional turmoil both Phil and Leil had experienced, expressed her understanding. She validated their feelings, acknowledging that Phil must have felt mortified, and even suggested that Leil, as the one who had recommended L.L. Bean’s products, must have felt terrible as well. This simple act of empathizing with their emotions, rather than deflecting blame or offering excuses, had a transformative effect.

In mere moments, Leil’s anger dissipated, replaced by a sense of understanding and even sympathy toward the brand. The agent had skillfully employed the Echo the Emo technique, allowing them to vent their emotions and demonstrating genuine empathy. It was a masterstroke that not only diffused the situation but also left her with a positive view of the company.

The Power of Echo the Emo

In essence, Echo the Emo is a potent technique that highlights the significance of emotions in communication. When people are facing emotionally charged situations or seeking to express their feelings, they often need an empathetic ear more than a barrage of facts. By allowing them to fully express their emotions and empathizing with their feelings, you can create a connection that transcends mere information exchange.

In the case of L.L. Bean, the customer service agent didn’t offer a detailed analysis of the pants’ manufacturing process or a lengthy apology. Instead, she acknowledged our emotional state and expressed genuine sympathy. This approach had a profound impact on how we perceived the situation and the company itself.

Whether you’re dealing with a customer complaint, a friend sharing their concerns, or any emotional interaction, remember the power of Echo the Emo. Facts may speak, but emotions shout. To truly connect with others, sometimes all you need to do is listen, empathize, and let emotions take center stage.