In leadership and power, there are countless stories of individuals who ascend to high positions only to let their success cloud their sense of humility. However, there are also those remarkable leaders who, despite their lofty positions, remain grounded and humble. In this article, we will delve into a true story beautifully recounted by Simon Sinek on his YouTube channel. This story encapsulates the essence of humility in power, as shared by a former Undersecretary of Defense. Through his candid revelation during a conference speech, we discover a powerful lesson that transcends titles and resonates with anyone in a position of authority.
The Story Behind the Styrofoam Cup
The former Undersecretary of Defense’s tale begins with an unremarkable object: a Styrofoam cup. Yet this simple cup becomes a powerful metaphor for a broader and more profound lesson about the transient nature of power, the importance of humility, and the difference between a person and the position they hold.
At the height of his career, the Undersecretary was accustomed to a luxury lifestyle typical for someone holding such a prestigious position. He was flown business class, carefully arranging every aspect of his travel. A chauffeur was always waiting for him, whether it was at the airport or the hotel, and his itinerary was perfectly curated, with no room for mistakes. His hotel was always a first-class establishment, with the staff taking care of every detail before he even arrived. Upon entering these spaces, he was treated with deference—he didn’t have to do anything. Everything was laid out for him. He didn’t have to navigate the crowds when he spoke at conferences. Instead, he was led through back entrances, avoiding the fray, and ushered into a green room where he could relax before stepping onto the stage.
The privileges didn’t stop there. As a symbol of his office, his coffee was served in a beautifully crafted ceramic cup—an elegant and polished reminder of his role. Every interaction and gesture reflected the status his position as Undersecretary of Defense granted him. For those in positions of authority, this kind of treatment is commonplace. It reminds them of their importance, the influence they wield, and the respect that their title commands.
However, this luxury quickly faded when he stepped down from the role. Gone were the business class flights. Gone were the chauffeurs and the seamless transitions from one place to another. His new reality was far more humble: he flew coach, navigating through crowded airports independently. There was no one to whisk him away to a private car or to check him into a luxury hotel room. Instead, he took taxis and walked through the front door, mingling with the crowd rather than being escorted behind closed doors. When he arrived at the venue where he was to speak, no special treatment awaited him. He found his way backstage and was directed to the corner where a simple coffee machine stood when he asked for coffee. There, he poured himself a cup into a Styrofoam cup, a symbol of his new reality—no longer a high-ranking official with a ceramic cup but a regular person, no more entitled than anyone else.
This shift was jarring, but it was an essential moment of self-reflection. The Styrofoam cup represented a humble object and the reality of the power dynamics at play. The cup wasn’t meant for him as a person; it was a product of his position, marking a significant point in his understanding of leadership and power: the luxuries and status granted to individuals in positions of authority are ultimately tied to the role itself, not to the person holding that role.
The Humility of Recognizing the Role, Not the Person
At the core of the former Undersecretary’s story lies a key lesson in humility: recognizing that the benefits and privileges that come with leadership are not inherently tied to the person but to their role. This realization is pivotal for anyone in a leadership position.
Leadership, especially in high positions, often comes with an aura of prestige. The title itself can command respect, and the benefits associated with such a title—luxury, privilege, and recognition—can blur the line between the person and the position. When in a powerful role, individuals can become so attached to their status that they begin to internalize the perks as a reflection of their worth. The challenge arises when that role changes or is lost, as the person is left grappling with the absence of those external markers of success.
The former Undersecretary’s reflection on his shift from a high-powered position to a more ordinary existence serves as a sobering reminder that power is transient. The respect accompanying authority is often more about the position than the person who holds it. Leaders who need help understanding this risk being caught off guard when their role ends or diminishes. If their identity has been too intertwined with the perks and accolades of their title, they may need help to adapt when the external rewards are no longer available.
The key to true leadership lies in maintaining a clear distinction between the role and the person. A great leader knows that their power is temporary and that their self-worth should not be tied to the trappings of power. They recognize their value lies not in their title or the perks they enjoy but in their ability to serve others, inspire change, and lead with integrity. The former Undersecretary’s story serves as a reminder that leadership is ultimately about the impact you have on others, not the title or recognition you receive.
The Lesson: Leadership Is About Service, Not Status
In the modern world, where status and recognition are often emphasized, the true lesson of leadership needs to be remembered: leadership is about service, not status. The former Undersecretary’s reflection on the Styrofoam cup is a powerful reminder that the real essence of leadership is in the responsibility to serve others, not in the external markers of success.
This shift in mindset is crucial for anyone in a leadership position. The best leaders understand that their primary role is to serve those they lead. Leadership is not about accumulating wealth, status, or accolades. It’s about creating a vision, aligning people around that vision, and providing them with the tools and resources they need to succeed. It’s about lifting others, not elevating oneself.
When leaders focus on serving others, they build trust and foster a culture of collaboration. They create an environment where everyone has the opportunity to grow and succeed rather than a competitive atmosphere where only the powerful thrive. Leaders focused on service understand that their role is to create opportunities for others, solve problems, and navigate challenges with the collective good in mind. This approach builds loyalty, respect, and a shared sense of purpose within teams and organizations.
Service-oriented leadership also helps to keep leaders grounded. By focusing on the needs of others, leaders are less likely to become consumed by the superficial trappings of their position. They remain focused on the bigger picture—the mission, the people, and the lasting impact of their work. This ability to serve rather than seek status sets great leaders apart from those merely in it for recognition.
The Styrofoam Cup: A Symbol of True Leadership
In the former Undersecretary’s story, the Styrofoam cup becomes more than an everyday object. It takes on symbolic significance, representing the humility that great leaders must embrace, regardless of the external rewards that may come with power. The Styrofoam cup starkly contrasts the elegant ceramic cup he once enjoyed, but it is not to be seen as a symbol of failure or degradation. Instead, it represents the reality of leadership: that the external rewards tied to power are fleeting and that true leadership comes from within.
This simple object embodies the idea that great leaders remain humble regardless of their external circumstances. When a leader drinks from a Styrofoam cup, it’s not a reflection of their worth but a recognition that the privileges tied to their position are temporary and not inherently theirs. The cup itself is not the issue; it’s the meaning leaders attach to it.
Leaders who embrace the Styrofoam cup mentality can focus on what truly matters: their mission, their people, and their impact. They understand that they are in a position of power to serve and uplift others, not bask in their title’s glory. By rejecting the temptation to equate their worth with the perks of the office, they create an authentic leadership style that inspires others to follow suit.
The Styrofoam cup becomes a metaphor for the grounded, service-focused leader who does not lose sight of the mission or the people they serve, regardless of their position. True leadership is about self-awareness, humility, and a deep understanding of the transient nature of power. Those who embrace this mindset lead with integrity, purpose, and clarity, never forgetting that leadership is about serving others, not securing personal status.
Humility as a Foundation for Effective Leadership
The former Undersecretary’s story underscores an essential lesson in leadership: humility is the foundation for effective leadership. Leaders who possess humility are better equipped to make decisions that benefit others rather than acting out of a need to preserve their power or status. Humility allows leaders to maintain perspective, remain grounded in their values, and focus on the people they serve.
Humble leaders recognize that their position is not a permanent entitlement. They understand they are merely custodians of power, entrusted with responsibility for a time. This awareness fosters empathy, respect, and collaboration within teams, creating an environment where everyone has the opportunity to contribute and succeed. Humility also ensures that leaders remain open to feedback, learning, and growth—key components of effective leadership.
In addition, humility allows leaders to navigate setbacks and challenges with grace. When leaders are not overly attached to their titles or the rewards of their positions, they can handle failure and disappointment better. They can view setbacks as opportunities for personal and professional growth rather than threats to their identity or authority.
Ultimately, the humility of leaders who understand the fleeting nature of power ensures that they lead with authenticity, integrity, and a deep commitment to serving others. This kind of leadership fosters trust, builds strong teams, and leaves a lasting impact on organizations and communities. The former Undersecretary’s lesson on humility is a powerful reminder that the best leaders understand that their worth is not defined by their position or the perks they enjoy but by their ability to lead with purpose and service.
Conclusion: We All Deserve a Styrofoam Cup
In conclusion, Simon Sinek’s engaging storytelling and the former Undersecretary’s insightful narrative underscores the profound message that humility in power is not a sign of weakness but a mark of true leadership strength.
It is an acknowledgment that the source of one’s authority and influence emanates not from personal entitlement but from the responsibilities and expectations associated with one’s role.
So, whether one is sipping coffee from a ceramic cup or a Styrofoam one, the message remains unchanged—it’s not about the vessel one holds but the character, empathy, and wisdom that guide one’s leadership.
In the words of the former Undersecretary, “We all deserve a Styrofoam cup. ” Those who remember this timeless lesson will navigate their leadership journey gracefully and effectively.