Kevin had no intention of buying wine. He rarely drank it, let alone the expensive Bordeaux variety. But there he was, walking out of the store with two boxes of fine Margaux. What made him change his mind? The sales assistant. She was not overly pushy or insincere; she was simply likable. And that’s all it took.
This scenario illustrates a powerful psychological principle: the liking bias. We fall victim to it more often than we realize, and it’s a key factor in how we make decisions, especially when it comes to purchasing. The more we like someone, the more likely we are to buy from them, help them, or agree with their viewpoint.
Understanding the Liking Bias
The liking bias is a powerful cognitive bias that affects how we perceive others and make decisions based on those perceptions. In essence, the more we like someone, the more likely we are to be influenced by them, whether in a social, personal, or financial context. This bias is about personal preference and how our minds are wired to favor positive, emotionally rewarding experiences. But what exactly makes a person likable? Research highlights three distinct factors that influence our judgment:
- Attractiveness: Physical appearance is one of the most well-documented aspects of the liking bias. Studies have shown that physically attractive people are often perceived as more personable, intelligent, and even trustworthy. This phenomenon, known as the “halo effect,” suggests that the positive traits we associate with someone’s appearance often spill over into our broader evaluation of their character. In advertising, this is why marketers often use models or actors who fit traditional standards of beauty: not only do they represent idealized traits, but their attractiveness also triggers an automatic, favorable judgment from viewers. Whether conscious of it or not, we tend to equate beauty with good qualities like competence and kindness, which helps explain why attractive people are often more successful in sales or influencing others.
- Similarity: Another powerful factor driving the liking bias is the tendency to feel drawn to people who are similar to us. This could be regarding appearance, interests, background, or values. The more someone shares with us, the more we feel we can relate to them and the more likely we are to develop a favorable opinion. In sales and marketing, this concept is leveraged through relatable spokespersons or characters who appear to “mirror” the target audience. For instance, if an ad features someone who looks like the average viewer or speaks in a familiar accent, it subconsciously signals to the audience that the person, and by extension, the product, is more relatable and trustworthy. This principle works because we are drawn to people who seem familiar and share common traits with us, fostering a sense of safety and affinity.
- Compliments and Validation: Finally, a fundamental aspect of the liking bias is how much we value being liked and validated by others. When someone compliments us or makes us feel good about ourselves, it fosters a sense of connection and trust. This is why compliments are such a powerful tool in influencing others. In sales, this often manifests as flattery—salespeople make customers feel special, appreciated, and valued, even if the compliments are generalized or exaggerated. Making someone feel good about themselves can trigger the liking bias and make them more likely to buy a product or service. This principle is so ingrained in our psyche that it’s utilized in various forms of advertising, where the consumer is made to feel like they deserve something special, often with messages like “Because you’re worth it.”
The Power of Liking in Sales
The concept of likability plays a crucial role in sales success, as demonstrated by figures like Joe Girard, the world’s most successful car salesman. Girard’s approach to selling was radically simple: he focused on making each customer feel as though they were personally liked and cared for. One of his key strategies was sending out a single card each month with the message, “I like you.” This small act of kindness, repeated consistently, built a connection between Girard and his customers that went far beyond the transactional nature of a sales relationship.
Girard’s approach exemplifies the core of the liking bias—by making people feel liked, he fostered a deeper sense of trust and rapport. This emotional connection was powerful enough to encourage customers to return to him when they needed a new car, not just because of the product but because they felt a personal bond with Girard. This illustrates that sales success isn’t merely about offering a great product or service but building an emotional connection that creates loyalty and trust.
One of salespeople’s most effective tactics to exploit the liking bias is mirroring. This technique subtly mimics the buyer’s body language, tone of voice, or speech patterns. When a salesperson mirrors their customer’s behavior, it creates a sense of familiarity, making the customer feel more comfortable and more likely to purchase. For example, if a customer speaks slowly and softly, the salesperson will adjust their speaking style to match. Similarly, if a customer uses certain hand gestures or facial expressions, the salesperson may replicate them to align with their emotional state. This mirroring technique helps build rapport and increases the salesperson’s likability, making the customer feel more connected and engaged.
Salespeople also often rely on compliments to enhance likability. By offering praise for the customer’s choices or tastes, the salesperson makes the customer feel unique, valued and understood. Compliments about the customer’s sense of style, taste, or judgment are designed to make them feel good about themselves, thus triggering the liking bias and increasing the likelihood of a sale. Ultimately, likability becomes a powerful tool for driving business success, as customers are more inclined to buy from someone they feel a personal connection with.
Marketing and the Liking Bias
At its core, marketing is about influencing consumer behavior, and liking bias is one of the most effective psychological tools employed in this process. Brands, companies, and advertisers have long understood that people are likelier to engage with products or services that make them feel good about themselves. This is why you often see advertisements featuring attractive, relatable individuals who mirror the audience’s values, appearance, or lifestyle. These campaigns leverage the liking bias by making consumers feel they have something in common with the people in the advertisements, which increases the likelihood that they will buy into the brand or product.
One of the most powerful uses of the liking bias in marketing is the portrayal of “aspirational” characters—people who embody the ideal lifestyle the brand wants to sell. For example, luxury brands often use models epitomizing wealth, status, and sophistication. These models are not only physically attractive but are also positioned as symbols of the lifestyle that the consumer desires. By associating the product with an aspirational figure, the brand triggers the liking bias, making the consumer feel that by purchasing the product, they, too, can embody the same qualities and lifestyle.
Similarly, many marketing campaigns focus on relatable, everyday people who appear to be “just like you.” Whether through shared interests, similar backgrounds, or an appealing personality, these characters are designed to resonate with the target demographic. For example, an ad for a sports drink might feature athletes who look and speak like the viewers themselves. This familiarity creates an immediate bond between the consumer and the product, as it signals that if someone who looks like them can enjoy the product, they, too, can benefit from it. This connection increases trust and likability, two essential elements for driving sales.
Moreover, the liking bias in marketing also taps into the emotional side of decision-making. Consumers are often more likely to make purchases based on emotional responses rather than rational thought, and the likability of the people involved in an ad plays a significant role in this. Brands that understand this use appealing, charismatic figures to influence the emotional state of their audience, making the product seem more desirable simply because the person representing it is likable.
The Role of Liking in Charitable Campaigns
Nonprofit organizations and charitable campaigns are adept at using the liking bias to drive donations and support. The core principle is that people are more likely to give to causes they feel emotionally connected to. This connection is often facilitated by portraying likable, relatable individuals or creatures in advertising. For example, many charitable campaigns feature smiling children or women, as these faces tend to evoke an immediate emotional response. The more relatable and human the subject, the more likely viewers are to feel compassion and take action.
Charities can create a deeper emotional connection with their audience by focusing on likable figures, such as children or animals, that evoke sympathy. These figures become symbols of vulnerability, and we are more likely to feel a sense of responsibility to help those who seem similar to ourselves or elicit a strong emotional response. In contrast, campaigns that feature less relatable or emotionally compelling subjects, such as an adult man in distress or an environmental issue involving an abstract concept, tend to receive less attention and support. This is why most charity advertisements feature individuals who are both likable and vulnerable—because people are more inclined to help those they can emotionally connect with.
The selective use of likable faces is not limited to humanitarian causes but extends to other charitable endeavors, including environmental campaigns. Conservation groups, for instance, often feature adorable or majestic animals, such as pandas, tigers, or elephants, because these creatures are universally loved and evoke strong emotional reactions. In contrast, less charismatic creatures, such as insects or microorganisms, rarely appear in conservation ads, even though they may be just as endangered and equally crucial to the ecosystem. This preference for likable figures taps directly into the liking bias, making us more likely to support causes that feature these emotional triggers.
Politics and the Liking Bias
In politics, likability is often as important as policy knowledge or leadership ability. Politicians have long recognized that emotional connections are key to gaining support from the public, and they use the liking bias to their advantage. Whether through speech, media appearances, or public relations campaigns, politicians work hard to craft an image that is relatable, likable, and trustworthy. They often tailor their messages to the interests and concerns of their target audiences, focusing on issues that resonate with their specific demographic.
Politicians can create a sense of kinship with their audience by appealing to shared values or concerns. This builds rapport and trust, making voters more likely to support them. Politicians often use personal stories, humor, or relatable anecdotes to connect with their voters emotionally, reinforcing that they are “one of us” rather than an out-of-touch figurehead. This technique creates a bond and helps politicians appear more human and approachable, which is essential for gaining voter support.
Another key tactic that politicians use to leverage the liking bias is flattery. By making voters feel important and valued, they strengthen the emotional connection between themselves and the electorate. Phrases like “Your vote matters” or “We need your support” make individuals feel their contribution is essential, even if their vote has little actual impact on the outcome. This emotional manipulation taps directly into the liking bias, making voters feel connected to the candidate and more likely to vote in their favor.
Amiability Over Bribery
In business and high-stakes negotiations, likability is often more powerful than money or other incentives. A personal connection, fostered through shared experiences or interests, can open doors that formal negotiations or financial incentives cannot. For instance, in one particularly memorable deal, a friend secured a massive pipeline contract in Russia simply because he and the buyer discovered a mutual passion for sailing. This shared interest created an instant bond, transforming a typical business interaction into a more personal and trusting relationship. From that point forward, the buyer saw my friend not just as a businessman but as a friend—someone they could trust. The deal was sealed not through bribery or intense negotiation but through the power of likability.
This example highlights the power of amiability in sealing major business deals. People are more likely to trust and cooperate with someone they like, even if that person isn’t the most skilled negotiator or the one offering the best terms. Trust built on personal connection can often outweigh the transactional nature of business, leading to more successful and lasting relationships.
How to Leverage the Liking Bias
For those in sales, the key to success is making customers feel liked. Building rapport and creating an emotional connection increases your chances of closing a deal. This doesn’t necessarily mean you need to be insincere or overly flattering, but rather that you should focus on building trust and rapport through shared interests, mirroring, and complimenting your customers. When customers feel understood and valued, they are more likely to return to you when they need a product or service.
For consumers, the best way to counteract the influence of the liking bias is to remain aware of its power. While it’s easy to be swayed by a salesperson’s charm or flattery, evaluating the product or service on its own merits is important, independent of the salesperson’s likability. The next time you find yourself drawn to a product, take a step back and assess whether your decision is based on the product’s value or simply influenced by the likability of the person selling it. Doing so ensures that your decisions are more rational and less driven by emotional triggers.
Conclusion
The liking bias reminds us of the profound impact personal connections and rapport can have on our decision-making processes. Whether we are salespeople or consumers, understanding this bias allows us to navigate the realm of persuasion more consciously.
By recognizing the factors contributing to likability and being aware of their influence, we can make more informed choices and ensure that our decisions are based on merit rather than emotional attachment. So, the next time you find yourself drawn to a likable individual or influenced by their charm, take a step back, evaluate the product independently, and make a decision that aligns with your best interests.
This article is a part of The Cognitive Bias Series based on The Art of Thinking Clearly by Rolf Dobelli.